I want to SMELL LIKE SHEEP.

My rambling thoughts of being a Shepherdess for my Jesus

by Angel Thompson on Wednesday, February 8, 2012 at 10:34am ·

PublicFriendsFriends except AcquaintancesOnly MeCustomClose FriendsFamilySee all lists...FamilyErie Areathe big guy upstairsGrace Theological SeminaryAcquaintancesGo Back

In the past 4 years I have had the most humbling ministry. I get to shepherd our kids from Kindergarten – 4th grade in our KIDS Church. I have watched them grow, struggle and ask amazing questions about God, Jesus, life, family stuff and spiritual warfare that they have faced in their young lives. I have been a witness as God has grabbed their hearts and have heard them confess HIS NAME and tell everyone that they are making HIM the leader of their lives and from that moment forward that their hearts are HIS.

When I reflect back on the last 4 years I can only think of one ACTION word regarding shepherding kids…INVEST.

Webster's 1913 Dictionary States:

In`vest´

v. t.

1.

[imp. & p. p. Invested; p. pr. & vb. n. Investing.]

3.

To clothe, as with office or authority; to place in possession of rank, dignity, or estate; to endow; to adorn; to grace; tobedeck; as, to invest with honor or glory; to invest with an estate.

4.

To surround, accompany, or attend.

5.

To confer; to give.

6.

(Mil.) To inclose; to surround or hem in with troops, so as to intercept reinforcements of men and provisions and preventescape; to lay siege to; as, to invest a town.

I LOVE THIS PART OF THE DEFINITION AS WE AS SHEPHERDS DO THIS TO BRING SAFETY AGAINST THOSE THINGS THAT ARE RAGING ALL AROUND….WE INVEST IN THEM, SURROUND THEM……AS TEACHERS WE ARE LIKE A TROOP HEMING OURSELVES AROUND THEM TO KEEP THE ENEMY OUT AS THEY GAIN STRENGTH AND LAY HOLD OF GOD’S POWER IN THEIR LIVES.

8.

To expend (time, money, or other resources) with a view to obtaining some benefit of value in excess of that expended,or to achieve a useful pupose; as, to invest a lot of time in teaching one's children.

WordNet Dictionary

Verb

1.

invest - make an investment;

Synonyms: commit, put, place

2.

invest - give qualities or abilities to

Synonyms: endow, endue, gift, indue, empower

What happens however if the shepherd does not INVEST but has become….complacent?

Webster's 1913 Dictionary

Com`pla´cent

a.

1.

Self-satisfied.

What view and action will you take today in the areas God has placed you?

We are called to invest.

Matthew 28:18-20

Then Jesus came to them and said, “All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. 19 Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, 20 and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.”

Father, may all of our kids at YTWO feel your warmth today and may those who come in contact with one of your warriors experience something different and want to know more about you. Help all of the kids to BE THE ONE for you today. Protect them in the name of Jesus and grant them UNITY. In the name of Jesus ~ Amen

www.gccytwo.blogspot.com

www.churchofsecondchances.com

I had the honor...

I had the honor of sitting with an amazing mother today.
She is the mother of 3 beautiful boys. The middle child has Autism.
She is a survivor of ovarian cancer, breast cancer and she is now in the last stages of bone cancer.
I sat with her for an hour as she talked of her children and how she fought and advocated for them throughout her time with them. WE talked about her continued fight for her middle son and her passion for him to know he is loved and that he matters.
She talked of the difficulty of knowing how to help him through the grief, to understand that “mommy is dying”, and will soon not be here. I watched this mother talk proudly of her sons as she battles daily to maintain life.

I listened as she spoke of her ex-husband who left because he just couldn’t take anymore and her light appeared to dim for a while, yet she knew she could not stop for the sake of her children. After all, they were entrusted to her.

I stood with her sister who admires her and has joined her in taking up the fight for her middle son when she leaves this world.

I am honored that God gave me an hour to sit with a remarkable lady. We embraced as I left, one mother to another, raising children on the spectrum. I let her know, even though she is going home, her son has an Autism Family that will look out for him and be support for her sister.

As I walked to my van I sat and thought….how much we take for granted. The air we breathe. The warmth we feel. The food we have. Through aches and pains, yet the health we have been blessed with. Our CHILDREN and their voices, dreams, hugs and kisses. We fight over petty things that have no eternal value and take for granted the fight we should have for our children. A fight to show them that not only do we love them, Christ loves them. Not only do they matter, they matter to HIM. That they don’t have to wait to make an impact or have a purpose, they impact our lives daily and we NEED TO EMBRACE those moments.

As you breathe today
As you feel sun or rain
As you drive
As you shake a hand of a friend, hug a spouse
Hearing your child singing or even arguing……

TAKE NO MOMENT FOR GRANTED.

Embrace it.

Use it to SHOW HIS LOVE. Use it to TEACH THOSE WHO WILL FOLLOW BEHIND YOU.
Until your last breath …DO IT.

"My counsel for you is simple and straightforward: Just go ahead with what you've been given. You received Christ Jesus, the Master; now live him. You're deeply rooted in him. You're well constructed upon him. You know your way around the faith. Now do what you've been taught. School's out; quit studying the subject and start living it! And let your living spill over into thanksgiving."
Colossians 2:6,7

Unexpected Perspective

This past weekend Faith wanted to have a girls night and so she and I “camped out” in our back yard…in the van. Matt loved how I had “MacGyvered” everything. I had electricity hooked up for my breathing machine and for a fan as we would have the windows closed to keep out mosquitoes. Faith decided that Charlie would need to be with us as he would miss sleeping with her, so along he came.

We spent time as a family by the camp fire singing and roasting hotdogs, then off to bed. The boys went inside to comfy beds and AC and Faithy and I bedded down for the evening in the van.
Well, Faith had no problems getting all tucked in with Charlie inside her sleeping bag. I mustard around the front seat and had one leg over the steering wheel and one resting on Faith’s seat. However, Charlie did not want my leg there and he pushed it off. I attempted to get comfortable, yet to no avail. So I decided to go to the back and put down the second row seat, except for where my machine lay. I tilted the third row back and then propped my feet and legs on the second row. I found myself adjusting pillows and trying to find a way to rest.
I finally fell asleep….many times. Needless to say it was a restless night, but worth it for my daughter.

As I laid there my mind began to race as I began thinking of how many people in this world live in their vehicles or on the streets because they lack housing. Either due to their own choices or something out of their control.

The next morning as our girl weekend continued, Faith and I had a long discussion over how blessed we are. As we talked she was reminded of the homeless man we saw in Cincinnati who was sleeping behind a dumpster, and another we saw reach in the trash can and pull out leftover food and began to eat it.

How many of us go day to day and complain about the food we receive, or that it is either too cold or too warm in the house? What about complaining because we cannot find our favorite pair of shoes or clothes, or that someone did not do the laundry or take the garbage out? What about complaining that someone drank the last soda and there is only water to drink? This list could go on. Things that truly have no eternal impact. How many of us get caught up and take for granted how blessed we really are?

Faithy and I spent time talking to God and thanking Him for all we have, and it was quite a list.
Sometimes we need raw perspective. Here's a thought, go on a camping trip in your car for a day…you’ll find it.

1 Thessalonians 5:18
Philippians 2:14
Matthew 25:31-46

The Foster Dance

by Angel Thompson

Looking through the panes with water falling down
Tears captured on her shirt, with eyes searching round

The red car is gone, she now stands alone
And her tears now water the ground

Foster created for temporal rest
A given “sense” of what is believed best

Yet devastation reflected through tears
Fell upon caregivers deaf angry ears

She stands clinging for love of empty arms hanging
There’s a whisper of disbelief, “again… it’s happening.”

Another brick is placed high
There is no reason to deny why

Yet through the drive, she removes a brick
A moment gap of what makes her tick

How can I trust
When all experience is disgust, abandon, unloved.
No one wants, no second chance,
just forget and move on to the next Foster dance.

As CSB, there is more to see, more to do
How can we be more than just “basic glue”

The pain is real
And they are left to “deal”

With adults who give issues
That kid are just as tissues
And are quickly thrown away

Our position is vital
Yeah, more than a title
For we embark with the “thrown away.”

A bandaid is nice, but the patch is like “ice”
If spread with surface…platitudes

So what is your attitude
When she stands among the multitude
Of placements and removals this day
With her tears falling down
Again watering the ground
And the red car just sped away

Here is the chance…to change the Foster dance…

Seriously, what will your actions speak today

__________________________________
This poem is dedicated to all the kids who have been placed and placed and placed....Please know that we know you have purpose and that you matter.

This is also dedicated to those I work along side. You all amaze me that this is not just a "job". I have seen you cry over wrongs. I have seen righteous anger. I have seen incredible, unwavering support to those lives we encounter daily....to name a few of those who amaze me: Tania, Jane, Jennifer, Ashley, Cyndi, Jerry, John, Denise, Bridget, Ann, Michelle, Kari, Heather.....okay, seriously...too many to name...let me just say: ACCSB!

The Pain Scale

From the Sarcastic-Lighter Side of Angel Thompson
Subject: The Pain Scale

I think doctors and hospitals need to implement a new “pain scale” that allows one to “describe the pain” because let’s face it when they say “on a scale from 1-10, 10 being the highest..”, what you wish they would say is “on a scale from 1-10, 100 being the highest…”
An EMT once heard me describe my pain instead of the scale and my description was “it feels like someone has shoved a skewer up my tush.” She said she would never forget that description. So, on that note…

After being in the house for 11 days post surgery, I was (notice the tense) feeling a bit better and had yet (again, notice the tense) to use pain meds. The kids were starting to feel well and Joshua had been saving to buy a new game for his game boy. So, I decided that I could drive them to Game Stop and then the Dollar Tree so Faithy could get something also. After that hour, if you were to ask me on a scale from 1-10 with 10 being the highest to “rate” my pain….this is how it would go.
“Have you ever fallen down the stairs on your tail bone? Okay, it’s like that, but coupled with someone hitting my tailbone over and over and over and over and over and over and over…breath…over and over and over. Then for good measure, kick me in the tail bone so I fall down the flight of stairs on my tail bone.” So, would that be a 10?

I’m thinking that a description works far better for them to GRASP the pain rather than a silly number used for counting.

Hope you all have a wonderful day….off to take pain meds now. It would be interesting to hear how I would describe my pain then.

My simplified pain scale if one must use numbers.

grip...freedom...hope

grip 1 : to seize or hold firmly (What PANDAS D/O has on our son)

free·dom b : liberation from slavery or restraint or from the power of another (What we petition to Christ for daily regarding the grip of PANDAS D/O on our son)

hope Isaiah 40:31 "but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint." (What we cling to.)

www.4jart.blogspot.com

My VERY rambly thoughts.

Sitting here being reminded of how the smallest things that seem not to matter or are seen as intolerable are truly works of art by God's hand.

He did not create the dandelion to be this awful weed that "destroys" your lawn or causes so much "stress" if you have one.

I love dandelions. It shows that you have a healthy yard and that wherever you see them it is a path well traveled.

Uhm...interesting. Do we sit and try to figure out how to rid our lives of all that we see as "bothersome"? To where there is no evidence that we have traveled the path to others, to embrace them...to show them Christ's love. Oh, I pray my footsteps leave a HUGE path of "dandelions".

My children pick dandelions for me every summer and it reminds me, as they hand me a bundle, of all the lives that Christ may bring to my door...or me to theirs. May that path then lead them to HIM.

AUTISM YESTERDAY, TODAY, TOMORROW...

Saturday evening Joshua opens Daddy’s Bible on the hotel bed and finds the book of Joshua. He asks me to help him find 1:9. I sat down beside him and flipped through the delicate pages until the Bible rests open to Joshua 1. Joshua scanned the page as I led his eyes to verse 9. He began to read, “….Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go."

He then took a breath, and with a “chomp” of his teeth, he closed the Bible and hopped off the bed.

It's Sunday morning and we are getting ready for church. With a hop, a chomp, and a knock of the knees we are now headed to the van to begin our adventure to see and worship with old friends.

Joshua and Faith make their way to Xtreme Kidz where they are greeted with hugs. He makes his way to the climbing wall with a hop, a chomp, a chin knock to the shoulder and a snort.

Church is now over and we are having lunch with our friends. He and Toby have a great time sharing pizza and talking. Joshua looks down the long table and grabs my attention. He asks through chomps and head nods if he can share his cheese pizza with Toby. As he hears yes I see him hop in his seat and give Toby some of his pizza.

We are on the long drive home. He leans forward and says to Faith, “Hey Faith…I love you.” She responds back, “I love you too.”

He spends the next hour and a half singing, snorting, nodding, chomping and “hopping” in his seat belt.

We are finally home. What an incredible weekend we had with friends!

Joshua’s chomping increases as his chin hits one shoulder then the next. He walks down the hall stopping to knock his elbows on the wall and knock his knees together.

He is now having trouble going to bed as fear creeps into his thoughts. He begins to talk about school and feeling as if he cannot achieve anything and feeling as if he knows nothing. I begin to share with him all he knows and marvel with him of his incredible ability to know so much about things. I can see in his eyes he feels overwhelmed and he begins to cry over the anxiety. I reach over and cradle his head as he cries. I then walk him up his ladder to his loft and sit with him. His chomping and nodding are so constant he can barely get a sentence out in tact. He then looks at me, and through the anxiety of tics he says, “Mommy, do autism boys ever marry girls and do autism girls marry boys?” I answer yes. He then says, “Do autism boys marry autism girls.” I begin to tear and answer his question again with a yes. He then looks at me through chomping and states, “That is good, because we don’t laugh at each other.”

I looked deep in his brown eyes and asked him if he feels different than other people. He did not look through me as sometimes he can. His eyes engaged and he said, “Yes.”
I wish I could say that this entry has some deep meaning. Yet, today it’s just a mommy who longs to comfort her son who is struggling with his Autism. A mommy who sees her son in such anxiety that if I could…I would take it on just to give him a moment of peace.

I looked in his eyes when he said “Yes”…that he felt different and I told him that I was so thankful that God made me his mommy and that I love everything about him, especially his autism. I then reminded him of his verse in Joshua 1:9
“….Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go."

Life is so uncertain…yet there is one thing that is constant during the moments when fear creeps around us daily, and that is our LORD is with us wherever we go….we do not have to be terrified.

Pigeon holed...the forgotten....GO!

The pigeon holed, the forgotten, we are blinded by what we see. Not by shear sight, but by choice and they are dying right before you…and me.

I cannot sleep. I don’t know if it is the physical pain I am in or the pain that is seeping from the very recesses of my soul and heart.

I know that people “use” the system. I know that people buy what they want and beg for what they need. I know people “use others” to gain and remain in their own pit…and yet there is this one phrase within a commission given to all of us who say we are followers of Christ. Not even a phrase but a word…GO! Go therefore into all the world…..

Don’t you find it interesting that He did not say, BRING THEM TO THE CHURCH. WAIT FOR THEM TO COME. HAVE A GREAT PROGRAM AND THEY WILL…..

Today my job sent me on an interesting journey…one where I found myself along with a colleague driving through a park…not filled with swings and sand boxes. It was filled with trailers that did not even resemble anything livable. Many did not have sides, the insulation was exposed. When glanced you could see a family inside. Another did not have windows and inside were lights and pictures…another family trying to survive. “Home” after “home” we drove by in search of a family we had a call on. We both have

seen worse, but today hit me hard as it did her.

A “park” filled with the forgotten, those we have pigeon holed as “users” of the system where we say if they want they need to come to us and then, maybe we will help.

What if it were me?

I called Matt and asked if we could do a mobile soup kitchen. We currently have this ministry that meets at the church, yet as I looked at these “homes” knowing that there are more than 47 kids who live there….many without transportation my heart heard the word GO! It wasn’t WAIT FOR THEM TO COME BECAUSE YOU HAVE THE FACILITY.

How can we show people the Christ, the Savior, the Lord, the GOD of second chances if we continue to pigeon hole them, close our eyes to them and wait for them to come?!

If my memory serves me…CHRIST WENT TO THEM…He walked right up to the woman at the well. He walked up to the adulterous woman. He walked up to the tax collector. He walked up to the hungry, bleeding, poor, sick, desperate, suicidal, homicidal, lost, in search of meaning, drug addict, alcoholic, user… He walked up to….me and He walked up to you.

We are called to be His Ambassadors of reconciliation. (2 Corinthians 5:16-21)

The pigeon holed, the forgotten, we are blinded by what we see. Not by shear sight, but by choice and they are dying right before you…and me.

Journal rambles...

I was just sitting here in a moment of pondering when God brought back a journal entry I wrote 2 years ago, and I thought, “I would love to share that today….” Then I remembered….that journal is nestled nicely, deep in the recesses of the computer that crashed. The computer that states it no longer has a hard drive present.

I love computers. It doesn’t take me long to sit down and figure something out on them and begin creating. Having fibromyalgia I also find it easier to type away on the computer than to literally write with a “writing instrument”, although I still enjoy “pencil” journaling.

Yet today as I sit here “tapping” out my thoughts I feel a sense of loss. My thoughts and heart were in the words saved within the hard drive that died. Over the years I have journaled and have been able to go back and read through my old journals that I wrote in my own hand. My friends always tell me that to read anything I write would take a decoder. So, I started adding “decoders” at the top of my letters to help them. That became the joke.

Anyway, now I sit here realizing that a section of my thoughts are gone.

Do you all remember when movies came out on DVD? It was the beginning of the end of VHS, right? We were told that DVD’s and CD’s would not only replace our audio and visual tapes, but it would be the last thing you buy because they would last a “life time”. Whose lifetime? How many of you find that your VHS videos last longer than your DVD’s?

Matthew 24:35 states, “Heaven and earth will pass away, but my words will NEVER pass away.”

I love that passage. We live in a very temporal world and knowing that the words of my Lord are forever…..Never changing….His promise is set with a seal. Even if someone takes my Bible away from me…I can hide His words in my heart to recount because they are ETERNAL.

My earthly journal is gone, yet obviously, my LORD’S “JOURNAL FOR LIFE”, has not, nor can be destroyed and increases in number daily! From the written, to the typed, to the computer, to translators, to audio, to visual….His HD….cannot be damaged, tampered with….and if it is hacked, those who read it contents…may they be changed for eternity.

You know what I find most interesting and impacting. No matter what blog entry or what we deem at incredible and worthy of remembrance….most often, we never remember those. Yet, I can remember His words of promise to me and in those moments of uncertainty, it’s not my journal entry I go to, it’s not someone else’s blog….I remember His Word and cling to that!

Song of Songs 4:7 “You are all beautiful to me, I see no flaw in you.”
Nahum1:7 “The Lord is good, a refuge in times of trouble. He cares for those who trust in Him.”
Proverbs 25:25 “Like cold water to a weary soul, is good news from a distant land.”
Proverbs 16:19 “In his heart a man plans his course, but the Lord determines his steps.”
Proverbs 16:3 “Commit to the Lord whatever you do and your plans will succeed.”
Joshua 1:9 “Have I not commanded you, be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”
Jeremiah 29:11 “For I have plans for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”
2 Corinthians 1:22 “He anointed us, set His seal of ownership on us, and put His Spirit in our hearts as a deposit, guaranteeing what is to come.”

The short list of a few tucked in my heart...

Tent Pegs and Canvas...a day of ramble

I have never been a lover of change, and yet I married a man who thrives on it. My things stay in the spot I place them. My books go back in the spot I pulled them from. During our first year of marriage Matt wanted to change the house around every week. We finally came to a compromise of changing it every 6 months. Our son arrived and once he was diagnosed with Autism the word “change”…changed.

Even though our son is not a lover of change (just like his mommy), and it takes him months to transition, I am amazed at how he lives and faces change.

When you surrender your life to Christ….one who never changes…have you found out that things are in a state of constant….change? I would venture to say that today we live our lives with “TENT PEGS” in our back pockets, that I married a man who loves the smell of canvas and since my decision to follow Jesus back in 1987, I have inherited the same love and so has our son and I pray for that love to enter our daughter as well.

Okay, canvas has thrown you, hasn’t it? The Israelites lived in tents…traveled where God led them and they would put down their tent pegs and raise their tents and CAMP there. Claim it there, be there, explore there, engage there, look for opportunities there, glean there, worship there…JOIN HIM THERE.

The moment I forget the smell of canvas or that I have pegs in my back pocket is the moment that I become stagnant and complacent. I want to be ready at any given moment for a God encounter when He is saying…”Look, did you see that…go!” Or, “Listen, did you hear that…bask in it, lavish here with me…” “Join ME!”

Tent pegs and canvas does not mean “moving” in the literal sense. It represents the opening of your heart, mind, soul and strength to be totally HIS, that if He but whisper you would begin to unfurl your tent somewhere to join Him. What that looks like is between you and Him.

My son has been learning about the “tent pegs and canvas” as he shares his love for Jesus with everyone he meets. Just yesterday he asked the Dunkin Donut girl if she could hear his JESUS music. (Penny, he loves it when I say, O hear O Joshua…)

When I have to literally pull up my tent pegs I feel a bit like Paul. Mind you I did not have to walk miles or sail for weeks or months, yet my heart aches when I have to leave those that I have shared hearts with to encourage, equip, build up….

For those I came to visit and with in a moment of wind had to leave…I give you the words Paul gave Philemon and know that my heart is ever drawn to each of you.

“I always thank my God as I remember you in my prayers, because I hear about your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love for all the saints. I pray that you may be active in sharing your faith, so that you will have a full understanding of every good thing we have in Christ. Your love has given me great joy and encouragement, because you, brother (sister), have refreshed the hearts of the saints.”

Traveling with Angel today....my thoughts....

It is no secret; I did not grow up with my parents my entire life. It is not a secret that my father has been married more than once, twice, three times….you get the idea. My brothers and I lived with our grandparents for a while when we were toddlers and when my older brother and I were 12 and 13, we went to live with them permanently while my two younger brothers lived with my dad and then, wife. I wish my two other brothers would have been with us….I really missed them and growing up with them under the same roof.

It’s true there is a deep longing in the heart for family, parents….love and acceptance. No matter what your past is, even if you try and deny the longing…it is there. I remember when I was overseas, talking with a fellow missionary and she asked me if I thought my birth mother loved me. I remember sharing at that time that I did not believe she did. She then asked me if I had a longing for her and I was very quick to say, “NO”. She, of course, did not believe that. There was a longing there that I did not want to believe existed.

Did you know that we have a deep longing in our very souls for God? We have a deep longing for our Heavenly Father? Oh, we may try and deny that…but it is true. I remember being outside of His family…trying to fill the longing, trying to find purpose.

Ecclesiastes 3:11 states:
He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the hearts of men; yet they cannot fathom what God has done from beginning to end.

Just reading those words bring tears.

And then I read in Psalm 139:15,16
My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth, your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.

I remember the intense love that grew as I carried Joshua and then Faith. It is truly something ineffable. Now, here is our God who knew us before we were even formed. He placed within each heart a desire for eternity. That “taste of the sweetness of LIFE” with Him. Can you grasp the immensity of that? A longing for Him in our hearts….we were HIS before we were even born. Then sin enters the world and snatches His LOVE and all these years He has been pursuing to take HER (US) back. I remember when I gave my heart to Him….i thirsted for HIM, could not get enough of HIM. Even in my “veteran” years as a follower….I still cannot get enough of HIM.

Joshua asks me daily if there are “don’t knows” (people that we don’t know) who are going to Hell. He has a burning to tell them about Jesus; (and does every chance he gets) that incredible Hope he has found and continues to learn and thirst for. Just today he was trying to grasp that God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit are ONE God.

To answer my friends question…I do believe that my birth mother loves me. I am sure she has the deep longing in her heart and that her birth children are just beyond reach. My mom has been incredible with trying to understand my relationship with her…even the need for relationship with her, whatever that may look like. (And I thank her for that.) Living most of my life with my grandparents…my heart misses them…yet I do know, because of the eternity that was placed in their hearts just like you and I and them accepting HIS pursuit…I will one day see them again.

Oh Lord, what a day today has been for reflection on my “eternity gift” that you have placed in my heart on so many levels. May my eternal heart along with the eternal hearts of, my children, my husband, my friends, & my family always long for MORE of You…and, to quote the verse that Joshua continued to say today:

Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. 1 Peter 3:15

To be an adjunct...?

Okay...it's snowing and I need to just have fun with words...which I know will cause someone to have the need to write and correct me...but that is the joy of just having fun!

I love reading the titles of faculty and staff members of colleges and universities because the wording makes me stop, ponder and at times....chuckle. Why is it that in the same school you will have people listed as Associate Professor and others listed as Adjunct Professor. Don’t they really mean the same thing....You are “an associate” of that program? Or, did the person who was typing just get tired of typing Associate and decided “let’s really make our school look cool. It seems like we have a lot of people listed as “associate”...let's find another word for "associate". So they hit their thesaurus and see "ADJUNCT", and thus you now have "Adjunct Professors.

Seriously, which one sounds better. Associate….sounds like you have at least two years experience or Adjunct...add on helper. (My husband shares, over my shoulder, that since he cannot pronounce the latter he thinks it sounds more important.)

It's a snowy day...I think I'll be an "adjunct baker of cookies" with Faithy today!

Hoping you all can be an adjunct today!

NT's can learn social behaviors from kids with ASD

Our son has Autism....I know, most of you know that.

As parents of a special needs child, there are things that you never think you will ever hear and when you do....you are totally blown away, humbled and PROUD of your child. Many of you have heard us praise God for every thing Joshua has accomplished and for the things that we know he will.

• Learning to communicate, talk when they were not sure he would be able to.
• Learning to ride a bike on his own.
• Becoming STUDENT of the Month at his school.
• Publishing his first book.....
• And then....this Christmas hearing the words that WE as parents never thought we would ever here....

As we sat with our friends and their child...who is an incredible, precious and loving little girl and a very typical 3 year old, (totally love it); we heard the words....."Try and be like Joshua and Faith."

Matt and I looked over at our friends and chuckled saying, "We never thought we would hear those words...that someone would encourage their child to be like Joshua." (We know he's great!)

This just proves that just because a child has a disability...it DOES NOT define them; and, that Neurotypicals can also learn and glean life skills from our kiddos.

Thank you, Lord for how you work in our kids lives....

It's true, we NT's can also learn appropriate social behavior from our kids on the spectrum.

It’s raining here.

It’s raining here. I’m tired, and it’s raining here.

The season is changing, Faith is noticing and…it’s raining here.

I have found that friendships can be like seasons that change and that…it’s raining here.

Just when I think I have come to grasp “contentment” with change, I find that…it’s raining here.
Like my son who has Autism, the change is never “content” and…it’s raining here.

God has His reasons and it’s all for His glory, and through the midst…it’s raining here.

I have come to learn that a broken pot can receive water and give water….so let it rain here.

Life is uncertain, no matter the circumstances we face, life is uncertain. Nothing human can stop the rain that happens to pour on our lives at times, and it is then that we need to just stop trying to fix it with our preverbal umbrella of human solutions. The rain we face can represent anything that disrupts “how we think” life should be. It can represent a moment of loss or illness. It can also represent a newness about to begin. No matter the uncertainty you face today…in the midst of the down pour or light mist….just let it rain knowing that Christ is the one who brings calm to the pouring and misty storms around us.

Woman in Rain Photo: by Rinderart www.dreamstime.com
Rain Photo: www.fotosearch.com

Just a moment of thought after a letter from a dear friend who shared news from a mutual friend that was only for a season. Thank you, Lord, for that season.

Rambling Journal Thoughts that you are privy to...

As most of you know, we have two children. Joshua and Faith. Faithy is our typical child who says some of the most interesting things. Her expressions are priceless as is her sarcasm. She is precious. Joshua is our oldest child and he has Autism. He is a card, full of imagination always coming up with new ideas for adventures to have…even if they are in his mind.

With typical kids you know they grasp a great deal…they are not adults and should not be expected to react so…they’re kids who have emotions, feelings and thoughts. Most times when you hear a child has Autism, your first thought is that because it is a neurological disorder it means they “don’t get it” or “they are slow”. That is not true, actually, quite the opposite. Joshua soaks in so much more than we realize. At the tender age of 6 he blows us away often with his profoundedness of life and how he takes it in.

When you have a child with special needs, your desire is to live forever. Any child wants their parents to live forever. I remember crying to my grandma when I lived with them, asking her to “never die”.

Last night Joshua ran up to Matt with tears and said, “Please don’t die, when I become a big person, please don’t die.” He is beginning to grasp what death is and that he would be alone. As his mommy I told Matt that I pray daily that I would live to be 120…unless Christ returns first.

He sat on my lap the other night and asked me about marriage and if one day he could have a wife. He then said, “I want to marry and have children….can I do that?” My 6 year old, with Autism is already planning for his spouse and family. He has a desire for relationship…he has grasped and has a deep desire for what God has created us to have, and that is relationship with Him. Our little boy who almost stands to my shoulder longs for love from another and has a desire to pursue that. Wow.

As a parent of two precious children, my desire is to be Christ’s reflection before them. That they grasp that they are made in God’s image. (Faith realized last night that God and Jesus are the same…she thought that was cool) That they learn that life is sacred and we are not enemies with people. (Sometimes I think we as Christians forget that). I pray they see the love Matt and I have for one another and for them, that they see the love we have for others….that they experience Christ’s love and it draws them to HIM.

I’m so pensive today…maybe it is the reality of life lately through my children, through this new journey here, through the most interesting situation of uncertainty that is before us. (the only certain thing I know and grasp to is that Christ is my Lord and one day He will return.)

This is truly one of the most scattered notes I’ve written in awhile, yet I’ve been studying and thinking of what true spirituality is, what it means to embrace the spirit and I have been challenged again by my son who just so happens to have Autism.

I guess I have rambled long enough. Have a great week all. Praying you experience God in a unique way that causes you to embrace His Spirit…and find His complete grace.

Hearing Devices...random thoughts....

No matter how you try and hide the fact that you are losing your hearing...it is never easy to try and adapt. Adapting is not always funny. Okay, sometimes it is...okay, most times.

Here are just some of my thoughts...in a 2 minute clip...about hearing devices. Be sure to wait after the credits so you can hear Joshua's quick thoughts!

Just my thoughts...

Ever have one of those days when you sit down to type and your fingers freeze? The past several days as I have sat and started to type my blog entry God has stopped my fingers from typing. Until today as He has been speaking to my heart and thus, my fingers are tapping.

Over the past several weeks and throughout the day I have been pondering what is important.

There is a huge part of me that wants to shut everything off, sell everything and move deep into the woods to get away from all that gets in the way of what is important.

Think about it…what is truly important…

I look down and watch my daughter sitting in my arms, wanting my embrace, my love, my time. (important) I hear my son running down the hall (because he doesn’t walk anywhere) wanting to show me something, wanting to hear praise and wanting “chin lovin’s” as he calls it. (important) At night I watch my husband sleep knowing he wants me near him, even when he sleeps. (important) I open my heart to hear God’s voice, as He wants me to know Him more intimately and I also hear and sense the urgency in my time with Him. (important)

What urgency? Sometimes we forget the urgency because of all the chaos and noise around us. It doesn’t hit us until something happens to stop us…whether it is the loss of a job, a friend, a spouse…something happens and you find yourself standing with your face against it and you cannot escape to the right or left.

What urgency? That all would come to hear and know the saving Grace of Christ. Those close to us and those around us in our community and beyond.

How? By the reflection of how we live, how we deal with circumstances in our lives, and we respond to situations that arise. Time we spend, meeting them where they are, speaking their “language”, which doesn’t always mean a foreign language. Maybe it’s through music, sports, video…whatever the avenue…finding what touches them and meeting them there and sharing with them in a unique and relevant way the SAME Gospel of Jesus Christ.

As I think of importance and urgency I never want in my vocabulary to be the phrases that I have heard others say:
“Oh we don’t do that here”
“If you don’t feel like your needs are being met, find some place that will meet those needs.”
“If you don’t like it, just leave.”

As the Body, we should not only feel the urgency, but we should also be exploring, finding and implementing whatever avenue necessary to heed that urgency call.

This entry is in no way meant to offend, nor is it a pointing finger....just my ponderings today as I sit back and reflect on what is important and listen to the winds of urgency.

Just a nonsense entry about...THE WEATHER

As I'm researching I notice the weather flashing ORANGE on my computer screen...."91 degrees".

So, I click on it and it does say it is "91" with a severe Thunderstorm warning. (which it did arrive moments later like a little hurricane)

As I look down and read the weather board on my screen...it stated that the temp is 84 but it feels like 87.

Okay...so where does 91 come in?

Ah, it's 84, feels like 87 when cloud covered and 91 in the sun????

It's 84, and the sun has you believing it's 87 with it's hypnotic rays, but it's really 91 and it's laughing at you because you only put on 15SPF????

Seriously, what does that mean, and why can't they just pick one temperature?

Okay, I've been in the sun too long!

photo: www.dreamstime.com

Packing and the trace of life

I am sitting here with my cut off turtle neck….okay, arms cut, not the bottom. I am so not one of those who look in the mirror and say, “Yeah, lookin’ good” until I see myself in the light. I did find it humorous the other day. I had on a sleeveless shirt, and had yet to put on my second shirt. I was standing infront of the mirror fixing my hair when Joshua walked by and said, “Oh no, your arms are naked, I cannot see that.” He is so used to me wearing two shirts and sometimes an added sweater...not exposing my arms. Sorry, I digress.

So I am sitting here taking a break from packing up the kids rooms and then off to the other areas of house, getting ready to move, realizing it was only 7 months ago that we bought this house. Making it our own, painting the rooms colors that reflected our personalities….a place to finally call “ours”. Our plan (did you catch that?) Our plan was to stay in the house for 5 years and then give it to the church, yet obviously God’s plan…is always much bigger. The church will still get the house, but we are moving on and away from where we are. The New Chapter with boxes and newspaper.

Packing is not something I enjoy. Change is not something I look for and honestly, I try to avoid…yet I continue to find myself smack in the middle of it all.

Packing…

Yet, I sit here reflecting I realize that “packing” does not totally mean you are “gone”. There is always some form of remnant, a trace left to say that you were there….or that is how it should be. I love that when Christ “packed” and went home to prepare a home for us that He left something….He left His Spirit. To comfort, to guide, to be…..

When we leave any place that we have had significant relationships in, there is something that remains whether good or bad and it touches the very lives we have spilled over onto and into. Whether it was a touch of concern, console, encouragement, sympathy, empathy, compassion, humor…it somehow remains. The truth can be said with a negative touch of bitterness, envy, hatred, gossip, pain, words of malice, being ignored….it also somehow remains.
There is a place in this world that I do not like to visit because of remnants that remain that spilled over my childhood and young adult life. On the flip side there is also another place that I love and long to one day return to, and embrace my friends….just as Paul longed to see Timothy.
My deepest prayer is that as we enter this New Chapter that our remnants that remain are ones that brought a touch of love, concern, console, encouragement, sympathy, empathy, compassion and a lot of humor. That those remnants draw you to the feet of Christ and that they truly reflect HIM. And, when we come to visit may it be as Paul to Timothy.

Please know that we love you all! Now and always.